I will be posting my answer to last week’s Joe Knows question on Wednesday. You can find last week’s question here. We’ve had some great answers given to last week’s question regarding family vacations.
Here’s this week’s question:
Hi Joe,
My wife and I have four children. Our oldest is 19. She won’t do anything around the house. She has a job that she’s kept for three months now, which is the longest she’s ever had a job. She sleeps untill noon most days and won’t keep our rules regarding curfew. I’m tired of beating my head against the wall. I threaten her and end up taking almost everything away. Nothing’s worked. Her mother, who is my wife, wants to put her on medication but I don’t think that’s necessary. What do you think? Help.
~Tired Father
What do you think my friends? What advice would you offer this tired father? Be sure to check back on Wednesday for my answer to last week’s question.
Frankly, I don’t believe there ought to be a curfew on a 19 year old … but I find that I am an extreme minority to have that opinion. I didn’t have one, but then I was home most nights anyway. I had my own key and was only asked to let my parents know if I wasn’t going to be home. But again – I also worked, gave a good part of my check to them, and never caused problems.
I’m a bit at a loss for want of more information. This man has given a little tidbit here which suggests there has been counseling of the daughter – this question of medication. With that being true to this specific case, I am tempted to say I don’t feel qualified to advise without knowing what the counselor has said and what medication and why she might need it. If there is truly a condition that is causing this, then of course they should heed the treatment advice of a professional!
But if I were faced with this question in my own congregation, and it was nothing more than, “She is lazy,” then I would suggest making her move out – as hard as that would be. This would have to be as a last resort, after all attempts to talk to her and help her plan her life and future have failed.